


Sorry for Party Rocking

by EmeraldTrash666



Category: Devil May Cry
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canon-Typical Violence, Comedy, Family Fluff, Gen, Light Angst, Voidpunk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:46:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28013400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldTrash666/pseuds/EmeraldTrash666
Summary: Even for demons, genetics are rarely so simple as a 50/50 split- Yet the environment in which one is raised can have just as much of an impact on their behavior as biology does. Is the strange creature that haunts Redgrave City human, or demon? What is its connection to the Legendary Devil Hunter, and what dark secret is he hiding? Is the power of Sparda bluetooth compatible?
Relationships: Dante & Lady (Devil May Cry), Dante & Vergil (Devil May Cry)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 21





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A short, sweet side project that, like most of my best fics, is inspired by a dream. Hope you enjoy!

Redgrave City was a strange place. Local tradition held that the Legendary Dark Knight Sparda lived in a manor on the outskirts of town, along with his human wife. To most outsiders, this was nothing more than an urban legend; After all, Sparda was nothing more than a myth, wasn’t he? 

Yet the few individuals who chose to walk one of life’s seedier paths, those who made their livings as devil hunters, knew better- For there was no one who hadn’t heard tales of the Legendary Devil Hunter, the son of Sparda. An odd, reclusive figure who began working as a devil hunter at a young age, aided by his demonic blood as he slaughtered his own kind; He was notoriously selective with his jobs, only taking on missions he found “interesting”, yet when push came to shove there was no demon he couldn’t kill.

None of that, however, had anything to do with why Lady was in Redgrave City. Real or not, she couldn’t give two shits about Sparda, or his kid. Redgrave City just happened to be the nearest place with food after her latest job, and damn, she was hungry. It was a pit stop, nothing more.

...But that didn’t mean she wasn’t going to listen in on demon-related gossip.

“For the last time, the answer is no,” a nasally, droning voice grumbled from a seat at the diner’s bar counter. “I’ve said many times before, I will have nothing to do with that demon.”

Lady glanced over, curious, to find a distressed-looking elderly woman speaking to a young man with white hair. “But the children! My granddaughter’s always going to parties at the old church, I-”

“If it worries you so much, then how about you tell your granddaughter to stop attending drunken parties in a demon’s lair?” the man replied tersely. “The stupidity of humans is none of my concern.”

The old woman paused, looking taken aback. After a moment’s shock, her expression shifted from distress to anger.

“You ought to be ashamed of yourself, young man! To think that a nice couple like your parents could somehow raise such a heartless son… Aren’t you supposed to be the so-called ‘Legendary Devil Hunter’? If you’re so ‘Legendary’, why can’t you protect your own city from a single demon?!”

“Because the church demon simply isn’t worth my time.”

“Why, you-”

A booming, mischievous laugh rang out through the diner. Lady, along with the young man and the old woman, turned towards the far end of the bar to see another white-haired young man, clad in red and black leather, laughing and shaking his head.

“Aw, he’s so full of shit. The reason Vergil won’t fight the church demon,” the man in red interrupted, casually flicking a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth, “Is because he knows he can’t beat him.”

The first man’s expression and posture quickly deflated, shifting from a guarded haughtiness to long-tired irritation. “So  _ you’re  _ here, huh,” he muttered, casting a glare towards the newcomer.

“Hey! Is that any way to greet your dear little brother?” the other man retorted, feigning hurt. “How about, ‘Oh, Dante, it’s so good to see you! I missed you so much!’ Hmm? C’mon, Vergil, let’s hear it.”

“The fact that we share genetic material does not mean I have to tolerate your existence,” Vergil grumbled in response. “And regardless, I saw you like, three days ago.”

“Aww, I know you still missed me!” Dante teased with a grin, hopping off his bar stool and making his way towards Vergil. “You know what you need? A big ol’ hug and kiss from your favorite brother! Mmmmmwah-”

As Vergil held Dante firmly at arm’s length with one hand, rolling his eyes, Lady turned her attention towards the old woman. “Excuse me,” she said gently. “What’s this about a demon?”

“Ah, new in town, are you?” the woman guessed, giving Lady a sympathetic look. “There’s an old, abandoned church on the hill outside the west side of town. It’s a popular spot for parties among local students, but the problem is that a demon took up residence in the church several years ago. My granddaughter is always going to parties up at the church,” she sighed. “I worry about her and the other kids so much… I had hoped the Legendary Devil Hunter would be able to take care of the demon, but-”

“But he just doesn’t have the power to take him out!” Dante interrupted teasingly.

Vergil growled. “You want to see power?” He held up a fist, and with a strange blue flash of energy, he flicked his fingers out towards Dante; Dante gave an indignant yelp as he found himself suddenly launched backwards towards the far end of the diner.

“Hey! No fighting in the restaurant!” the older man behind the counter exclaimed. 

“Sorry, Fredi,” Dante and Vergil muttered in sync, as Dante picked himself up from the floor. 

Lady raised an eyebrow at the brothers, but turned her attention back towards the old woman. 

“I’m, uh, sorry to hear your granddaughter’s been worrying you so much,” she began awkwardly. “I’m a devil hunter myself. I’d be happy to take care of this demon for you.”

The old woman gasped. “Oh, would you?! Oh, goodness- I can’t thank you enough, miss,” she insisted, relief clear on in her expression and voice.

“Hey, I’m just doing my job,” Lady replied with a smile. “What’s your offer?”

“My… Offer?” the woman replied in confusion. 

“You know… How much you’re going to pay me?”

“Oh…” The old woman frowned worriedly. “I’m afraid I don’t have much money…”

Lady’s smile vanished, and she sighed. “I’m sorry, but this is my business. I’ve gotta keep myself fed, and risking my life doesn’t exactly come cheap. Neither do bullets.”

The woman went quiet, chewing her lip. Lady said no more.

“Check, please,” she called out to the man behind the counter. 

“Wait!” the old woman blurted out. “I may not have much money, but- I know someone who does.”

Lady paused, raising an eyebrow as she turned back towards the old woman. “I’m listening…”

“Uroboros Corporation. They’ve been-”

“It’s three-hundred-seventy- _ seven, _ Dante! We’re even!” a shout drowned out the old woman’s voice.

The old woman sighed. “Uroboros Corporation has been-”

“No, it’s three-hundred-seventy- _ eight, _ and I’m up one! Or did you conveniently forget when I threw you off the roof last month?!”

“Hey! Could you keep it down over there?!” Lady shouted, leaning back in her seat to glare at the two men- The older of whom had a bizarrely long sword pressed against his brother’s throat. “I’m  _ trying  _ to have a conversation here!”

The two brothers pointedly ignored Lady as Dante struggled against Vergil’s sword. “Where the hell did you learn to count, Dante?!” Vergil snarled as he kept his grip firm.

The man behind the counter sighed, rolling his eyes as he handed Lady her check. “I’m sorry about them. Let me handle this,” he told her, and then turned his attention towards the two men, slamming his hand down loudly on the counter to get their attention. “Hey, Dumb and Dumber! Need I remind you I have your mother’s number on speed dial?” he shouted.

There was a moment of tension as both their eyes widened, and the two abruptly broke apart, standing up and acting as if nothing ever happened. Vergil cleared his throat and brushed off his pants, while Dante stretched and gave a yawn.

“Thanks for the sundaes, Fredi,” he said calmly, giving a lazy wave as he turned towards the door. “Just put it on Vergil’s tab.”

Vergil’s head snapped towards Dante. “What?!”

“Will do,” Fredi replied, gathering up Dante’s questionably large number of empty sundae glasses despite Vergil’s fuming glare. “Do me a favor and don’t scare off my customers next time, would you? And Cindy, stop oogling and get back to work.”

Lady sighed as a young waitress jumped in surprise, her face blushing bright red. “Anyway, what were you saying, ma’am?” Lady continued, turning her attention back towards the old woman.

“Oh, yes. Uroboros Corporation has been looking to develop the land the old church is on for some time now, but the demon’s given them trouble,” the old woman explained. “I’m sure if you go to them, they’ll be more than happy to pay you a decent sum.”

“Uroboros Corp, huh… Alright. I’ll keep that in mind. Thanks for the tip,” Lady replied, intrigued. A big corporation? Sounded like she had her next job in the bag. Enough money to cover a few months, and then some.

Lady smiled as she stood up, humming to herself in cheerful anticipation of an easy job.

* * *

The moment Lady set foot in the old abandoned church, she could tell damn well it was a party spot, and couldn’t help but cringe slightly at the sight of it. Beautiful gothic architecture clashed with heaping piles of empty pizza boxes, cartons of ice cream, and empty bottles and cans. A myriad of various speaker systems, musical instruments, and even an old jukebox were scattered throughout the main hall, along with various old, beat-up pieces of furniture. The whole place smelled strongly of pizza and fire.

Lady entered the church quietly and carefully, handgun at the ready. A sound like a low growl caught her attention, and she immediately turned towards the source of the sound, raising her gun in anticipation of whatever was waiting for her. The noise appeared to be coming from a couch in the apse; Lady saw no demon, however, only… What looked to be embers..?

Frowning, she approached the couch carefully. It was then that she saw the demon.

The demon in question was humanoid- By far not the largest demon Lady had faced, yet still a fair bit larger than herself, taking up the length of the couch and then some as it lay evidently sleeping. Its face would have been almost human if not for the leathery, reptilian skin that covered it, surrounded by bony spikes and four curved horns protruding towards the back of its head. The rest of its body appeared similar, covered in red and black scales and spiky protrusions. A pair of insectoid wings, tipped by two long, bony claws, wrapped around the demon’s torso; Peeking out from between them was a dim glow from within cracks in the demon’s chest. With each growling snore, the flame burned slightly brighter for a brief moment, sending tiny embers up into the air.

Lady raised an eyebrow, her gaze drifting towards the half-eaten slice of pizza that hung from one of the demon’s claws, as well as what appeared to be an empty bottle of tomato juice. Weird choice of diet for a demon… But whatever. At least the fact that it was asleep would make her job easier. 

As Lady fired several shots into the demon’s head, it gave a shout of surprise, fire spitting to life as the demon jumped up from the couch.

“Hey! What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” the demon demanded in an inhuman, almost metallic voice, looking more surprised than anything. “Who the hell just walks into someone’s house and shoots them while they’re napping?! Fuckin’ rude!”

Lady scoffed. “Your ‘house’? This is a church. And monsters like you don’t belong in churches,” she replied coldly.

The demon raised a scaly eyebrow in response, glancing at Lady with eyes of glowing flame. “You new around here? This place hasn’t been in use as a church in at  _ least  _ a hundred years. And I’ve been living here for three. I live here, ergo, this is my house,” it said in a matter-of-fact tone, gesturing around at the collection of furniture and junk surrounding them.

“Yeah, whatever. Enough with the talk,” Lady decided, flipping her Kalina Ann around and steadying it against her shoulder. “Any last words, demon?”

The demon blinked in confusion. “Um-”

“Time’s up.”

Lady braced herself for the recoil as she fired Kalina Ann, the familiar scent of gunpowder drowning out that of pizza. The demon gasped- And then Lady’s eyes widened in surprise as it grabbed ahold of the rocket, and flipped up on top of it.

Lady could only stare, baffled, as the demon rode the missile around the room as if it were a skateboard, its laughs and cheers echoing off the walls of the old cathedral. After a few seconds, Lady came to her senses, and growled as she fired several smaller missiles; The demon gave a grunt of surprise as it was knocked off the larger rocket, colliding with one of the speakers with a loud  _ crunch _ .

“Dude! That was my favorite speaker!” the demon gasped as it stood up, turning to stare with wide-eyed heartbreak at the large dent it’d left. “Man, what’s your problem, anyway? What’d I ever do to you, huh?!”

“I’m a devil hunter,” Lady replied simply. “I was hired to kill you.”

The demon narrowed its gaze in suspicion at Lady. “Hey, wait a minute… I remember you now! You were at Fredi’s the other day, right?”

Lady blinked. “How did you-”

“Who hired you? Let me guess, Uroboros Corp, those fuckin’ dicks, it was them wasn’t it?” the demon interrupted. “How much is Arius paying you?”

Lady frowned as her finger hovered near the trigger. “Why should I tell you?”

“Why shouldn’t you?”

Lady tilted her head, frowning in confusion at this; The demon had a point, she realized. It wasn’t like it mattered if she was going to kill it anyway.

“I’m being paid thirty grand,” she replied with a shrug.

The demon made a noise somewhere between a laugh and a growl. “Only  _ thirty?!  _ Jesus! I’m worth at  _ least _ a million, if not more,” it insisted. “Considering this is Arius we’re talking about, I’m not surprised he’s fuckin’ scamming you, but I can’t believe you really fell for that… You must be new to the business, right?” it guessed. “Come on, you’ve gotta have a little more self-respect than that. You’re not going to make it anywhere as a devil hunter if you let your clients fuck you over like that. Uroboros is rolling in dough, they can afford to pay you a proper rate.”

Lady paused, confused. Why was the demon saying these things? It didn’t make sense for it to care whether or not she was being paid a fair price to kill it. Hell, she didn’t think most demons cared about human currency at all, if they even had any knowledge of the concept. And yet… Well, the demon  _ was  _ right that she was still fairly new to being a devil hunter. The insinuation that she was being taken advantage of stung slightly, and she couldn’t help but want to know more, even though deep down she knew it was probably just a trick to distract her. (Although, she noted, the demon hadn’t yet made any attempt to fight back… Strange.)

“...What makes you think you’re worth so much?” she questioned suspiciously.

“One: I’m incredibly strong and  _ incredibly  _ sexy,” the demon replied, jumping up to sit atop the old pulpit sounding board, spreading its wings and leaning back casually. “Two: I doubt anyone wants the Legendary Devil Hunter Vergil  _ and  _ the Legendary Dark Knight Sparda coming after their asses. Three-” the demon paused, frowning and tilting its head. “...Uh, yeah actually I dunno, I guess that’s about it? Whatever. Point is, I’m worth a shitload of money, and you shouldn’t be letting Count von Tax Evasion there cheat you out of it.”

“I- Why do you even know what taxes  _ are?”  _ Lady couldn’t help blurting out. “What the hell kind of demon talks about shit like tax evasion?”

“Well, believe it or not, I’m half human,” the demon replied. “Name’s Dante, by the way. Oh, and speaking of tax evasion- I’ve got an idea,” it said with a toothy grin.

“I’m listening,” Lady found herself responding despite it all.

The demon- Dante- Hopped down from the pulpit, producing a gust of wind as it (he?) landed gracefully, wings folding up once again.

“Alright, here’s what I’m thinking. You go back to Uroboros, tell ‘em I was like really tough or something- Whatever. Demand they raise the price. Ideally go for at least a million, if not more, but if you can’t get that much, at the very least don’t take less than twice what they’re paying you now. If they refuse to raise it that much, tell them the deal’s off,” Dante explained, speaking as if he’d thought the plan out quite thoroughly. “Once you get a decent price out of them, I’ll pretend to be dead for a while, and then we split the money. Deal?”

Lady frowned. “Why should I split the money with you?”

Dante crossed his arms. “Well, first of all, I’m the one who clued you in that you’re getting scammed, and you owe me for breaking my speaker anyway. And besides…” he sighed, a melancholy expression passing over his face for a moment. “I don’t want to hurt you, but if it comes down to it… I won’t hesitate to defend myself and my home, and neither will my family,” he added quietly. “So really, this is your best bet. Either you and I scam Arius right back, or you get massively underpaid and get your ass kicked on top of it.”

Lady bit her lip as she thought things over.

“...How will we prove I really ‘killed’ you?” she asked.

Dante paused, tilting his head thoughtfully. After a few seconds’ pause, he held out his hand, and a dark longsword adorned with skulls materialized in his palm with a shimmering red magic.

“You can give them this,” he told Lady, tilting the sword back and forth idly. “Arius knows what my sword looks like, he’ll totally buy it. I’ll just let them hold onto it for a while, and that ought to be proof enough.”

“I guess that works,” Lady admitted.

Dante grinned. “Alright! So, what do you think? Are you in, or what?”

“Hmm… Extra money, scamming old rich white men, I get a day off… Yeah, sounds pretty good, actually,” Lady decided, an equally mischievous grin spreading across her face. “Can’t believe I’m saying it, but I’m in.”

“Fuck yeah! Let’s do some crime!”

“Damn right!”

As Lady shook Dante’s fiery hand in her own, she found herself wondering why it didn’t burn.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boy I love writing comedy (accidentally knocks over the angst bottle with my elbow) aw shit oh fuck aw beans

If you’d asked Lady only a mere month ago how she’d feel about teaming up with a demon, let alone _befriending_ one, she’d have said she’d rather be dead. And yet, against all odds, here she was. The fastest way to a Lady’s heart, it seemed, was cooperative mischief.

Amazingly, the scheme Dante had cooked up had gone off without a hitch. Apparently, Uroboros Corporation had gotten their asses handed to them by Dante more than once, and the group’s CEO, Arius, was so tired of him that he took Dante’s sword as proof of his death with glee and not a shred of doubt. He’d paid Lady double the original price, and then some, in cases of bills she split with Dante as promised.

...Of course, Arius hadn’t been too happy when the company’s attempts to survey the church property for development had been met with one very much still-living fire demon. But by that point a cool fifty grand had already been deposited securely in Lady’s bank account, so it wasn’t really her problem anymore, was it?

As Lady and Dante had proceeded with their incredibly shifty business arrangement, Lady had found herself quite surprised by how bizarrely… _Normal_ Dante was. Pleasant, even. Likeable. If it weren’t for his distinctly inhuman form and voice, she could have taken him for a college student- He sure lived like one, apparently, stuffing himself with pizza and then passing out on his shitty old couch in the middle of the afternoon on a regular basis. While most demons spoke like fairy tale villains (if they even spoke at all), Dante’s speech was almost endearingly casual, his sentences sprinkled full of a healthy dose of “dude” and “fuckin’” and the colloquial “like” as he excitedly shared his grand plans for how he was going to spend his money. His enthusiasm and mischief was infectious, and despite their differences, the pair found themselves becoming fast friends.

At first, Lady had doubted Dante’s claims that he was half human, as he sure as hell didn’t look like it; His behavior, however, soon had her convinced. As they got to know each other, he told Lady the truth about his origin. 

Apparently, Dante had lived his entire life in Redgrave City, raised by a human mother and a demon father. Unsurprisingly, due to his appearance, he’d lived most of his life in seclusion; His only friend growing up had been his twin brother, and upon reaching the age where he wanted to get out of his parents’ house, he’d opted to take over the old abandoned church on the hill, as it was close enough to town to visit easily yet still far enough to give him some relative peace. Or… So he’d thought, anyway.

Lady frowned as she pushed open the door to the old church, and was immediately met with flashing lights and loud music- And not the kind of loud music Dante generally played, either. No, this was party music, and the large crowd of teens and young adults in various levels of sobriety proved it. The main hall of the church had been quite thoroughly taken over, with the old stone altar and several shitty-looking tables covered in equally shitty plastic tablecloths, which themselves were covered in cheap (yet annoyingly enticing) food and drinks. A disco ball hung from one of the rafters, flashing bright lights across the hall; Lady blinked, baffled, as a girl silently handed her a pair of glow bracelets before dancing away.

“What the fuck..?” she whispered to herself, staring down at the glow bracelets in confusion.

“Ayyy, Lady!” a familiar metallic voice called out, and Lady glanced up to see Dante sitting casually in his “bedroom” (A messy loft arranged on top of plywood laid over the rafters), waving down at her. “Glad you could make it!”

“What the hell is going on?!” Lady shouted up at him.

Dante frowned, as if he hadn’t heard her. “What?”

“I said-”

“Aw, whatever!” Before Lady could continue, Dante jumped down from the loft, landing on the floor next to Lady with a gust of wind and ignoring the startled teens behind him. “Good to see ya, bro. You hungry? There’s plenty of food,” he said casually, gesturing to the buffet scattered around the room. “Pretty sure the brownies got weed in ‘em, though. Just, like, so you know. Man, what is it with humans and putting weed in brownies, anyway? Like, why brownies specifically? I don’t get it,” he thought out loud, frowning in confusion as Lady stared.

Lady said nothing, too busy being stunned by her surroundings. 

It baffled her just how bizarrely… _Uncaring_ the partygoers were about the presence of a demon. A few people stared at Dante, some giggling or pointing, but other than that no one seemed to care that he was there. Granted, Lady knew from experience that Dante was a big fiery softie- But there was a difference between cautiously getting to know a demon after working together, and just… Casually throwing a large party in a demon’s lair. Especially seeing as Dante had said he didn’t have any other friends, meaning these kids sure as hell hadn’t been invited. And besides, wasn’t it kind of rude to use someone else’s home as a party spot?

A few guys snickered and slurred taunts as Dante pushed past them to grab a can of soda and some pizza. As steam hissed off the hand that held his soda, he turned to Lady. “Come on, grab yourself something to eat and we can hang out in my room.”

Lady raised an eyebrow, glancing from Dante to the table; After a moment’s hesitation, she gingerly grabbed a soda and a paper plate of potato chips.

“Ready?”

“Uh…” Lady frowned at her plate, realizing she may have made a poor choice. She awkwardly folded it in half, trying her best to contain the chips without crushing them, and shrugged. “I guess?”

Dante nodded, and leaned down, hooking an arm underneath Lady’s shoulders. Lady wrapped her arms around Dante’s neck, and Dante spread his wings, ignoring the stares and gasps around him as he took off towards the loft with a powerful leap. 

“Oh shit, my pizza!” Dante exclaimed, quickly reaching out his plate to catch the slice as Lady slid down off his chest and onto the loft floor. “Jesus, that was close…”

“Oh hey, looks like I still have most of my chips,” Lady observed as she hesitantly unfolded her plate. 

Dante flopped down onto one of the two large beanbag chairs- A luxury bought with the money from their Uroboros scam- And popped the tab on his can of soda. “I’m glad you could come by tonight,” he said as he took a bite of pizza. “My brother’s coming over later, I can’t wait to introduce you two! You’ll like him, he’s cool- I mean he’s a bit of a pretentious prick and he doesn’t really like humans much, but he’s great once you get to know him.”

“Uh, yeah…” Lady frowned, still distracted by the (obnoxiously loud and bright) party going on below. “God, you really weren’t kidding about this being a party spot, what the fuck? Wh- How can they just- I just… How the fuck can they just… _Have_ parties like this? How the hell do none of them care that you fucking _live here?”_

Dante paused, his cheerful expression wavering for a moment. He tilted his head as he thought about it, giving a growl Lady recognized as actually being a thoughtful hum. 

“Hmm… You know how horror movies always have like, the dumbass teens who go off to fuck in the creepy woods for some reason, and then get eaten?”

“Yeah?”

“I figure it’s like that,” Dante explained. “‘Cept I don’t eat people, so… I just can’t make ‘em leave.” He shook his head, shrugging.

“Geez…”

“Yeah. Seems to be kind of a generational thing, too- Parents freak the fuck out about it, but ever since they realized I’m not gonna fight them, kids just don’t give a shit. To be honest, I get the feeling it’s kind of a novelty for them, like… You know, piss their parents off, make themselves feel like hot shit for hanging out in the big scary demon’s lair, that sorta thing.” He sighed. 

“That’s so fucked up, I mean- This is your _house!_ People can’t just randomly throw parties in other people’s houses! You live here!” Lady exclaimed in disgust.

Dante gave a small shrug. “Yeah, well… In case you hadn’t noticed, humans don’t really think of me as a person,” he muttered, and Lady couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt at the bitterness in his voice- But before she could say anything, he hurriedly tried to soften the mood with a halfhearted grin. “But hey, it’s not all bad. I get free pizza and drinks out of it, right? And I don’t really sleep at night much anyway, so it’s not like they’re keeping me up.”

Lady went quiet for a moment, staring down at the party below. A few people stared up at them, but otherwise no one seemed to pay them any mind. 

“...Is that why you set up your bedroom up here?” she wondered.

“Pretty much, yeah. I mean I like hanging out in high places anyway-”

“Like a gargoyle?” Lady teased.

“Exactly,” Dante laughed. “Like a hot queer gargoyle. But yeah, I did intentionally set things up so it’d be hard for humans to climb up here,” he admitted with a shrug. “I’ve seen a few people try, most of ‘em drunk, but nobody’s ever actually pulled it off.”

Lady nodded, and popped a few chips into her mouth. “You ever throw stuff at people from up here?”

Dante grinned. “Oh yeah, like, all the time.” 

As if to demonstrate, he downed the rest of his soda, wiping his mouth on the back of a scale-covered hand; He glanced down at the crowd, took aim, and tossed the empty can across the room with casual skill. It bounced off a partygoer’s head with a hollow _bonk,_ prompting the victim to glance around in confusion, though he soon seemed to lose interest.

“Ooh, nice shot,” Lady commented, giving a low whistle. 

Dante responded with finger guns and a wink, and then nodded towards the bed. “There’s some empty cans under the bed if you wanna join in. I like to save them for exactly this sort of occasion,” he said casually, with a slight smirk.

Lady laughed as she reached under the bed. “Alright, then. Let’s see which one of us has the better aim.”

* * *

Boots clacked against the old stone floor of the church. Not the trendy boots of a partygoer, light and cheerful in their steps; No, these boots brought heavy, deliberate footsteps, and with them, a cold atmosphere that did more to disrupt the mood than the demon casting projectiles at guests from above their heads. 

An awkward silence fell gradually over each person the newcomer passed by, hushed whispers going around as they stared at him with wide eyes.

“Um… Were you, like, invited?” a girl asked him, a slight slurring to her hostile tone.

“Were you?” the man replied simply. The girl opened her mouth to reply, and then paused, frowning in confusion.

Ignoring the stares of the crowd around him, the man turned his gaze towards the loft. “Dante!” he shouted, voice sharp and gruff as it boomed over the music. “There’s weird humans in your house again!”

The reply came postmarked with an empty beer can to the head. “Aw, that’s just you!”

Lady jumped as something flew past her head, and Dante grunted in surprise, suddenly pinned to the roof behind him by a spectral blue sword skewered directly through his chest. Lady quickly drew a gun, searching for Dante’s attacker- But before she could pull the trigger, Dante laughed, a sincere, warm laugh.

 _“Now_ it’s a party!” he exclaimed, grinning even as he pulled the blade from his chest with a shower of blood. 

With a graceful flip, Vergil leaped onto the loft, landing solidly next to Lady. Lady could only watch, stunned, as Dante beamed a toothy smile, arms held out wide as he pulled Vergil into a tight hug- And then lifted him up off the ground and over his head, slamming him into the floor in a supplex. Vergil responded in kind, throwing Dante against the plywood floor as he rolled onto his side, and quickly leapt up to jam the heel of his foot into Dante’s face. 

And then, just as before, Dante laughed. And Vergil joined him, a startlingly sincere smile gracing his usually stony face as he held out a hand to Dante.

“It’s good to see you, brother.”

“You too, bro,” Dante replied, taking Vergil’s hand as he stood up. “How’d that big job last week go? I saw Mom the other day and she said-”

“Hold up. _That’s_ your brother?” Lady interrupted, staring at Vergil in disbelief. There had to have been some kind of mistake, right? There was no way- Of course Lady knew Dante was half human, and of course she knew Redgrave City was the rumored home of the Legendary Dark Knight Sparda, but- There was _no_ fucking way Dante’s beloved twin brother was genuinely the Legendary Shitstain Vergil, right?

As Lady stared, open-mouthed, Vergil’s smile melted away into a taut frown. “Ugh, there’s a _human_ in your room,” he muttered to Dante, rolling his eyes. “How the hell did it even get up here..?”

Lady gave an offended huff. “Hey! I can hear you, you know! And I’m a ‘she’, not an ‘it’,” she snapped.

“Congratulations,” Vergil deadpanned, sparing Lady only the briefest of condescending glances before turning his attention back towards Dante. “Anyway, it was-”

“Woah, woah, hang on. Guys, play nice,” Dante sighed, glancing between Vergil and Lady worriedly. “Vergil, this isn’t just some random human. Her name is Lady, and she’s my friend,” he explained gently. “Lady, this is my brother, Vergil.”

“Since when are you _friends_ with _humans?”_

“Why.”

Dante took a deep breath, clasped his claws together, and watched his two closest companions as they stared at each other in much the same way one might stare at unwanted olives on pizza.

“...I see I was wrong in my assumption that you two would get along,” he said slowly, carefully. His expression kept a tense smile, but Lady raised an eyebrow as the flames that flowed throughout his upper body flared slightly in irritation.

Vergil let out a low hum, regarding Lady with suspicion. “Since when,” he repeated more deliberately, “Are you ‘friends’ with humans?”

“Oh, you know… Since she and I scammed Uroboros out of a hundred grand,” Dante replied casually, grinning as he wrapped an arm around Lady’s shoulder.

Vergil blinked, and then frowned, brow furrowed in confusion. “You what? When? And… How?” he wondered, glancing back and forth between the two of them.

“Last month. See, they hired her to kill me-”

Vergil rolled his eyes. “Of course they did. Idiots.”

“But they were only gonna pay her thirty, which is like, way too low, right?” Dante continued.

“Please. If I were to place a bounty on your head, I wouldn’t pay more than five dollars,” Vergil teased, though his voice remained as dull as ever. “Maybe ten.”

Lady couldn’t stop herself from laughing slightly at this, and Vergil raised an eyebrow; As he looked away from Dante, however, he was taken off guard, and gave a quiet “ow” as Dante flicked him on the forehead with his index finger.

“Anyway, so as I was saying. We talked it out, and came up with a plan. Lady went back and convinced ol’ Arius to raise the bounty, then I gave her Rebellion and let them hold onto it for about a week or so, so they’d think I was dead. And then we split the money, and we’ve been best bros ever since,” Dante finished his explanation with a grin.

“Hmm. I see.” Vergil stared at Lady as he wiped the blood from his forehead, regarding her with scrutiny. He then turned his gaze towards Dante, and his expression softened, though it still bore an air as if he were searching for something; He then turned back towards Lady.

“Well. I can’t claim to understand your… Social inclinations, Dante,” he said carefully, narrowing his eyes at Lady, “But I respect your freedom nonetheless.”

Lady raised an eyebrow. “That a polite way of saying you don’t like me?” she guessed.

“I could say it impolitely, if you prefer.”

Dante sighed. “Come on, guys, don’t fight until you’ve at least gotten to know each other… Vergil, be nice, please? For me?” he added, giving Vergil a pleading look.

“I was trying,” Vergil grumbled as he shot Lady a rather pointed glare.

“Alright, fine, I’m sorry,” Lady muttered reluctantly, crossing her arms as Vergil sat down on the bed. “There’s one thing I don’t get, though- Dante, I thought you said you and your brother were twins?” she recalled in confusion.

“We are,” the two replied in perfect sync. Ok, so maybe they _were_ related after all, Lady thought in surprise.

“You don’t look like it, though,” she pointed out.

Dante frowned. “Whaddya mean? Of course we do. Look-” Dante hopped off the beanbag chair and onto the bed, reaching around to pull at the corners of Vergil’s mouth, revealing a pair of sharp fangs. “We have the same teeth!”

Vergil gave a (strikingly demonic, admittedly) growl and smacked Dante’s hands away. “We do not!”

“Yeah, you really don’t,” Lady confirmed, raising an eyebrow at Dante; While Dante’s teeth were distinctly inhuman, Vergil’s were unremarkable save for the fangs.

Dante looked disappointed. “You really don’t see any resemblance?”

Lady shook her head.

“Hmm, in that case…”

The air around Dante seemed to distort, flashing with a burst of red energy. Embers crackled around him before dissipating into nothingness, and-

“...How about now?”

Where Dante had been only moments before, there now sat a man about Lady’s age, his build and face identical to Vergil’s- But that expression, that cheery, mischievous grin, that was unmistakably Dante’s. His white hair hung loose around his face in a fluffy bob, and he wore loose black leather pants, a long red leather jacket, and… No shirt. Lady raised an eyebrow in amusement.

Vergil rolled his eyes. “I see your fashion sense is just as gaudy as ever,” he muttered.

“Yes, Vergil, shockingly my tastes have not changed drastically since I saw you a week and a half ago,” Dante replied sarcastically. His voice was softer, lacking the harsh otherworldly edge it usually bore, yet it was still unmistakably Dante’s. “And besides, I don’t need to take fashion criticism from you of all people. Like, who wears a fuckin’ _cravat_ in this day and age?” he commented, giving a wide shrug and shaking his head in disbelief.

“Our father, for one,” Vergil pointed out.

“Please. Dad thinks it’s still, like, the Renaissance.”

“Alright, fair point,” Vergil conceded with a tilt of his head. “In any case, it’s a scarf, not a cravat.”

Dante gave a snort of amusement. “Riiiight. Well I’m so glad you told me, Vergil, because now that I know the proper terminology, you look _far_ less nerdy!” 

Lady could see the twitch of irritation in Vergil’s gaze as their brotherly debate degraded further and further. “Well at least _I’m_ wearing a _shirt,_ Dante! And with that jacket? I’d rather look like a nerd than some sort of… Unnecessarily sexual video game character,” he said, cringing slightly at the concept as he gestured to Dante’s outfit.

“Alright, fine. You wanna see me dress ‘normal’? Fine,” Dante grumbled, crossing his arms. With another flash of demonic energy, his outfit changed; His blood-red jacket was suddenly replaced with a much more muted-toned and practical design, while his chest was covered by a simple black henley shirt. (Although, Lady noted, he had kept the leather pants, and his shirt was tastefully unbuttoned.)

Vergil raised an eyebrow, tilting his head as he scrutinized the outfit. For a moment, he almost seemed satisfied- And then he narrowed his eyes, a clear suspicion in his gaze.

“...Turn around.”

Dante sighed, and obeyed, twisting around to reveal the back of the jacket.

 _“Why_ is there a big metal skull?” Vergil sighed, dragging a hand down his face in exasperation.

“Because it’s cool!” Dante insisted. “And ‘cause it matches my sword. Look, see?” He stretched out his hand, summoning the sword in question from the air and pointing to the large skull adorning its crossguard. “I’m coordinating my outfit with my accessories. It’s called fashion, dear brother.”

“Really? Well I for one happen to think _my_ sword would coordinate nicely with your blood,” Vergil retorted, his voice somewhere between a taunt and a threat.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh _yeah?”_

_“Yeah.”_

“Prove it, then,” Dante demanded, his voice distorting as he shifted back to his more familiar form. “You and me, outside, let’s go.”

Vergil smirked, a glimpse of fangs peeking out from behind his lips, his hand drifting to the sword at his waist. “Fine, but don’t complain when you lose.”

Without a further word, Vergil was gone almost before Lady could even register this fact, teleporting across the room. He glanced back at Dante with a taunting gaze for just a brief moment before slipping outside.

Dante laughed, and slipped his sword onto his back (How it stayed put, Lady didn’t know and frankly wasn’t about to ask), turning towards Lady with a grin. “Alright, Lady, how would you like to witness the rare and glorious sight of Vergil getting his ass kicked into oblivion?”

“Oh, I would love it,” Lady replied with an equally sadistic smile. She snickered, watching the partygoers as Dante wrapped an arm around her and took off towards the door. 

Dumbasses, all of them. Little did they know the _real_ fun was outside…

* * *

Despite their mutual assertions of superiority, Dante and Vergil’s sparring match ended in what could only be called a draw. Both lay in a heap on the ground, breathing heavily, exhausted but otherwise fine- Despite the massive amount of blood that soaked the ground around them. _(That_ was sure to grow some weird plants, Lady thought to herself.)

The fight had been long and violent, each combatant going at each other with full force in moves that would have hospitalized, if not outright killed, ordinary humans. Lady had been surprised to see Vergil, at one point, transform into a dragon-like demon form, with horns spewing blue flame like a jet engine and a long tail wielding a spectral blade; Then again, she supposed, if Dante could apparently swap back and forth between demon and human form at will, it only made sense that his twin could as well. Though apparently not forever, as a particularly brutal jab to the back had sent Vergil right back to his human self with a startled gasp.

All throughout the fight, there had been an air of genuine _enjoyment_ to it all. The twins had been laughing and smiling despite taking turns breaking each other’s bones, and their words were equal parts compliments and insults. Yet eventually their energy reached its limit, hence why they were both now lying in pools of their own blood. 

“I still say I won,” Vergil wheezed, not bothering to open his eyes.

“Nu-uh. I did,” Dante groaned in response. 

Lady rolled her eyes. “For the third time, guys, it was a tie,” she reminded them. 

Vergil gave a quiet snort. “As if a _human_ could judge our fights…”

Lady frowned at this, raising an eyebrow. “What do you have against humans, anyway?” she wondered. “Aren’t you one yourself?”

“You really want to know?” Vergil replied as he slowly sat up, rubbing at the soreness in his neck. Dante soon followed suit. 

“Honestly? Yeah,” Lady answered with a shrug. 

Vergil and Dante exchanged glances. 

“Very well, then, since you’re so curious. I will tell you,” Vergil decided, an unreadable expression on his face as he reached for one of the cans of soda Lady had brought outside. “Perhaps you can learn something from the story- Though I doubt it. Humans never do.”

* * *

_“Vergil. Veeeeeergil. Hey. Hey. Vergil.”_

_Vergil growled, shooting a glare of irritation towards his brother. “What?”_

_“Let’s play outside!” Dante exclaimed, jumping up and shoving his face between Vergil and his book with a toothy grin, the fire in his eyes blazing with excitement._

_“No.”_

_Dante’s smile fell. “Aww, why not?”_

_“Because,” Vergil replied in a matter-of-fact tone, shoving Dante out of the way. “I just don’t want to.”_

_“But it’s such a nice day,” Dante pointed out, gesturing towards the open window through which a warm breeze blew. “Wouldn’t you rather be outside than stuck in the house all day?”_

_Vergil gave a thoughtful hum, tilting his head as he considered Dante’s point. “Yeah, I guess it is… But playing outside’s kinda boring. There’s not much to do other than fight and play ball. And I don’t feel like doing that.”_

_“Oh… I guess you’re right,” Dante admitted, frowning slightly. “Hey, I know! How ‘bout we go to the playground?”_

_“We can’t,” Vergil reminded Dante. “Not during the day. You know that. We’d get in trouble for scaring the other kids.”_

_“Oh. Yeah.”_

_Again, Dante’s smile fell, and Vergil couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt at the look on his face. “Hey, it’s ok. We can go to the playground tonight, ok?” he assured Dante with a gentle smile._

_“I guess,” Dante replied, heaving a long sigh as he began restlessly pacing the room. “But I just- I don’t_ **_want_ ** _to go to the playground tonight! I want to go to the playground_ **_now!_ ** _It’s not fair,” he insisted, his pace speeding up, and Vergil glanced up in surprise- He could sense his brother’s frustration, see the angry sparks coming off his chest. “It’s not_ **_my_ ** _fault I look like this. It’s- It’s stupid! The playground is for kids, and I’m a kid, so I should be allowed to go the playground! I’m tired of going only at night! It’s so nice out today and_ **_I- Want- To- Go- To- The-”_ **

_Vergil gasped as the energy around Dante built to a roar before suddenly coalescing all at once; Both Vergil and Dante froze, staring at each other silently with wide eyes, neither daring to break the silence._

_Where Dante had been only moments before, there now stood a boy, his build and face identical to Vergil’s._

_“How did you do that..?” Vergil whispered in awe._

_“I… I don’t know,” Dante whispered back, seemingly just as confused as Vergil as he stared down at his hands- His newly human hands. “But… Look! Vergil, look! I’m- I’m_ **_normal!”_ ** _he exclaimed with a grin._

_Vergil frowned; Something about that didn’t sit right with him, something about the implications worrying him, though he couldn’t quite pinpoint what. But he refrained from voicing these concerns out loud, not wanting to ruin his brother’s joy._

_Dante bounced with an entirely different sort of energy now, grinning so widely it was a wonder his jaw didn’t fall right off. “Man, this is so crazy!” he exclaimed. He poked at his cheeks experimentally, and then giggled. “Woah, it’s so… Squishy!”_

_Vergil opened his mouth to speak- But there was no point to it, as Dante was paying him little attention, his mind going a mile a minute and his body along with it. Vergil watched as Dante dashed over to the window, craning his neck to look at his reflection in the glass._

_“Woah, this is- This is like, super crazy! Vergil, look! I look just like you!” Dante gasped in excitement._

_Vergil snorted. “Duh. We’re twins, of course you do.”_

_Dante gave no response, too busy watching his reflection with open-mouthed awe. Vergil raised an eyebrow as Dante pushed his hair back in an imitation of Vergil’s preferred hairstyle- And then frowned, shaking his head like a wet dog to return it to a messy bob. Unfazed, Dante then ran over to Vergil, grabbing his hand abruptly._

_“Now we can go to the playground! Come on, let’s go!” he shouted, and yanked Vergil forwards. Vergil gave a gasp of surprise, and stumbled slightly as his book fell from his hands._

_“Dante, wait-”_

_Whatever objections Vergil may have had, Dante paid them no heed as he broke out into a swift run, pulling Vergil with him out of the living room and towards the front door._

_“Mom! Dad! We’re going to play outside, bye!” Dante shouted at the top of his lungs as they ran past the kitchen._

_“Be careful, boys!” their mother called back._

_“Don’t kill each other!” their father added with a laugh._

_As Dante threw the front door open, Vergil faintly caught his mother questioning, “Honey, did Dante’s voice sound a little strange to you just now?”_

_Vergil sighed as he followed Dante down the hill, towards the old playground. He didn’t want to ruin Dante’s good mood, but… Well, as much as he did like the idea of playing at the playground during the day instead of at night, Vergil wasn’t sure how he felt about being around other kids- Human kids. Neither of them had ever played with other kids before, really, and frankly knowing how humans felt about demons made Vergil kind of reluctant to do so at all. Even if no one would be able to tell the difference now, Vergil didn’t think he’d be likely to get along with people who thought of him and his family as monsters. And besides, he liked the games him and Dante played together- He didn’t want someone else to intrude and ruin it._

_But Dante was determined to play at the playground, and no way was Vergil going to let him do it alone. Much as he didn’t want to, he’d go with him, so he could protect him. That was Vergil’s job as the older brother, wasn’t it?_

_Yes, that was Vergil’s job. To protect his little brother, his best friend. For that, he would- Begrudgingly- Try playing with other kids._

_Dante came to a skidding halt at the edge of the playground’s wood-chipped floor. His stillness lasted only a moment, as he soon bounded up to the nearest group of kids, Vergil in tow._

_“Hi!” Dante blurted out, grinning widely._

_“Hello,” a girl with golden pigtails replied._

_“I’m Dante! And this is my brother, Vergil. Me and him are twins- See, we look the same!” Dante introduced himself and Vergil with enthusiasm. “What’s your name?”_

_“I’m Katie, and this is Ben,” the girl replied, gesturing to her companion. “We’re not twins, but my dad an’ Ben’s dad are brothers, so that makes us cousins,” she explained with a knowing nod._

_Dante gasped. “Woah, your name is Ben? Did your mom name you after Ben Kenobi?!” he wondered._

_“Who’s that?” Ben replied in confusion._

_“You know, Obi-Wan Kenobi! From Star Wars!” Dante replied, as if this were obvious. “I love Star Wars. I’ve seen it like, a gazillion times. My favorite’s Luke ‘cause he’s cool and nice. I hope your mom named you after Obi-Wan, that’d be really cool,” he rambled on, talking a mile a minute. “My mom named me and Vergil after poets, but I think that’s boring. Vergil likes it though, he likes poetry. I like my name but I like Star Wars better than poetry. Do you guys like Star Wars?”_

_“I like Star Wars!” Katie replied with a smile. “My favorite’s Yoda.”_

_“I don’t,” Ben added simply._

_“My- My favorite is Darth Vader,” Vergil muttered quietly, an uncertain attempt to join in the conversation, as if his voice couldn’t make up its mind on if he actually wanted to be heard or not._

_Dante flashed Vergil a bright grin before turning back towards the others. “Well, that’s ok, Ben. Do you guys wanna play tag with me and Vergil?”_

_“Sure!” Katie and Ben replied in unison._

_Vergil frowned; He didn’t recall saying he wanted to play tag. But this error was soon forgotten as the game immediately began, and Vergil quickly found himself absorbed into it one way or another, grinning as he felt the wind against his face and adrenaline coursing through his veins._

_All around the playground the four chased each other, shrieking and laughing, climbing up and ducking under and dashing through the massive, maze-like wooden castle. Vergil watched as Katie went on a surprisingly vicious hunt against Dante, herding him towards a corner between the slide and the stairs; Dante, however, was just as deviously resourceful as ever, and Vergil smiled knowingly as Dante grabbed onto the wooden railing above and scrambled up the side of the structure like a spider._

_“Hey, no fair!” Katie gasped._

_“Ha! And you thought you had me cornered!” Dante laughed, hanging triumphantly off the side of the castle’s spire like a tiny King Kong. “Come and get me, unless you’re too- Ah!”_

_Dante gasped as his fingers slipped, his hold on the tower loosening in his cocky attempt to taunt his opponent. Vergil felt- And saw- Dante’s demonic aura briefly spike with panic, tiny wings reflexively unfurling to stop his fall-_

_Two high-pitched screams rang out over the playground._

_“M-Monster!” Katie shrieked as she backed away from Dante, no longer any playful excitement in her expression- Only fear. “Get away from me! Stay away!”_

_Dante gasped, eyes going wide as he held his hands out in an instinctual non-threatening gesture. “No, wait, I-”_

_Katie screamed once again, bursting into tears as she ran behind Ben. Ben, too, had gone pale as a sheet, and other nearby children and parents had begun to take notice of the situation as well._

**_“Monster!”_ **

_“It’s- It’s a demon!”_

_“Get away!”_

_“Freak!”_

_“Run, it’s dangerous!”_

_“I-I don’t wanna die!”_

_Dante stood in the middle of it all, frozen still, his eyes going wide as he glanced down at his familiar demonic form. He looked back up at the chaos surrounding him, the panicked adults and crying children; His lip trembled, and soon he was crying, too._

_“I jus- I-I just wanted_ _to_ ** _play!”_** _he shouted, throwing his head back with sorrow. Flames spewed from his chest and arms and lava poured from the corners of his eyes as he bawled, unearthly wails that shook with pain._

_Something inside Vergil snapped._

_Vergil felt a rage like he’d never known before bubbling up inside him, exploding out like an angry volcano. He barely even noticed his body changing as he moved, and a part of him wondered what was happening, but it didn’t matter- He welcomed the transformation, the strength to punish the other children for what they’d done to Dante. They had made his brother cry, and now they were going to_ **_pay._ **

**_“I’ll kill you!”_ ** _Vergil roared, his voice tinged with the same metallic echo he’d grown so used to hearing from Dante._ **_“You made Dante cry! I’ll kill all of you!”_ ** _he spat again, and lunged at the nearest human, ice blue claws slashing aimlessly in his haste to destroy._

_The next few minutes were a blur to Vergil. He felt nothing but seething anger, making his vision tunnel red and his chest feel raw with desperation. He continued to scream threats, hurling himself at anything that moved, crashing into things aimlessly without even flinching._

**_“I am never playing with humans ever again!”_ **

_By the time Vergil came down from his angry haze, there was no one left but himself, breathing heavily and trembling, and Dante, on his knees whimpering quietly to himself. The playground lay in ruins, its once-enchanting structure reduced to broken piles of timber._

_“I just… I just wanted to play,” Dante whispered, sniffling as he choked back another sob._

_Vergil bit his lip, and stumbled over to his brother. He gently wrapped his arms around Dante, pulling him into a tight, soft hug._

_“They’re fools, Dante,” he growled. “Humans are just stupid, mean, ugly bullies. I’m never gonna be like them. I love you, Dante.”_

_Dante sniffled. “I-I love you too, Vergil. Can we go home now? I wanna go home…”_

_Vergil nodded, and stood up, gently wiping a fiery tear from Dante’s cheek before taking his hand in his own. “Yeah. Let’s go home.”_

* * *

A silence fell over the churchyard as Vergil finished his tale, interrupted only by the sounds of the party inside.

It all felt so much more… Tragic, now. Of course Lady had been disturbed by the way the locals evidently thought so little of Dante that they were happy to use his home as a party venue, but… Had any of them ever invited Dante to _participate_ in the parties, she wondered? Was he anything more to them than an edgy decoration? Dante’s personality and habits were no different from anyone else’s, and yet… And yet…

“Do you see now why I do not trust you?” Vergil said tersely, interrupting Lady’s train of thought.

“I…” Lady took a deep breath. “Yeah. I understand.”

“Aw, come on, Vergil. She’s not like that,” Dante insisted, giving Vergil a sympathetic look. “Lady’s nice, really. And besides, all that shit’s in the past. I don’t blame those kids for freaking out, I-I mean… They were kids. How else were they supposed to act, you know?” he added with a slight laugh, though Lady could hear the slight hurt behind it.

“No, I… I’m glad you brought this up,” Lady interrupted, biting her lip as she steeled her nerves and swallowed her pride. “To be honest, there’s- I’ve been thinking about some things lately. Back when we first met, Dante, I… Said some things about you that were really fucked up,” she admitted, clenching a fist nervously as she met Dante’s gaze. “I don’t think the same way now, but that doesn’t erase the things I said, so… I’m sorry. And I hope you know that I really do want to be your friend.”

Dante blinked, seemingly surprised by the confession. “Oh… Well… Um, thanks, I guess,” he replied awkwardly, glancing away and rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t hold any of that against you, but, uh… I appreciate the apology. A-And I’m glad we’re friends. Uh. Yeah.”

Lady gave Dante a reassuring smile, and Dante hesitantly returned the gesture, sharp teeth peeking out from behind his lips.

Vergil hummed thoughtfully, glancing at Lady and nodding as if in approval. “Well. I suppose I must commend your self-awareness. It’s good to know at least _one_ human has some brains,” he said sarcastically. “That being said, should you ever do anything to betray my brother’s trust…” The air around Vergil crackled as he allowed himself a partial transformation, blue-black scales crawling over his hand as he flexed it pointedly in front of his face, making eye contact with Lady. “Rest assured, I will be more than happy to sharpen my claws on your _skull.”_

“What, even with all the fleshy bits attached? How would that even work?” Dante wondered, frowning in confusion. “And- Hey, wait a minute! C’mon, dude, no death threats, that’s rude!”

Vergil shrugged as his hand returned to normal. “As long as she behaves, then it doesn’t matter, does it?” he replied calmly.

“It’s still rude!”

“And since when have _you_ ever cared about manners?”

“I-” Dante paused, blinking as he realized he had no response to this. “...Uhhh…”

Lady couldn’t help but laugh, giving Dante a sympathetic slap on the back. “You know what, Vergil? I think maybe we will get along,” she decided with a grin.

Vergil’s expression dropped to a flat, irritated frown. “Oh, goodie. Lucky me. I think I’ll jump off a cliff.”

Dante joined in Lady’s laughter, matching grins spreading across their faces as Vergil pouted, all three illuminated by the colored lights of the stained glass and the twinkling stars above.


End file.
